


Scientists Do Not Communicate Directly

by emilyshee



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: 5 Times, M/M, Pre-Live Show: Condos, but pretty cute, fluff?, not sure this meets fluff-level cuteness requirements?, pre- condos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-26
Updated: 2014-09-08
Packaged: 2018-02-14 22:57:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2206179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilyshee/pseuds/emilyshee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They communicate using a series of obscure and arcane codes and signals. That is what is meant to be a scientist.</p><p>Or, Five Times Carlos Tried to Communicate "I Love You" Without Using Those Words.  And One Time He Used Them.  Sort Of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

1.

Cecil walked out of the radio station and spotted Carlos’s hybrid waiting for him at the curb, just like they’d planned. They hadn’t been on very many dates yet, and Cecil was looking forward to this one. He smiled and walked over, but slowed when he got close enough to see what Carlos was doing. He had hoped that Carlos would listen to the tail end of the show while he was waiting for Cecil to finish, but apparently Carlos had decided that this time would be better spent making a phone call, and he wasn’t done with whoever he was talking to yet. Cecil wasn’t sure if he should just wait or tap on the glass to let Carlos know he was there. But then Carlos caught sight of him through the window and waved, motioning for Cecil to open the door and get in. Cecil didn’t like the idea sitting there awkwardly while Carlos finished a phone conversation with someone else, but he slid into the passenger seat just in time to hear Carlos say, “I gotta go now, he’s here,” and then a beat later, “Mamá!”

Cecil smiled, his irritation gone. Carlos had been telling his mother about him.

“All right, all right, I’ll ask him, OK?” Carlos said, then, taking the phone away from his ear and looking at Cecil, “I know this is a bit to ask and you can say no, but my mother wants to know if she can talk to you?”

(Later, Carlos’s mother would tell Cecil that she was surprised that her son agreed to hand over the phone. “Usually, he doesn’t even tell me about his boyfriends until they’ve been dating for months, and he’s never brought anyone home,” she would say, “Half his relationships I don’t even find out about until they’re over.”)

* * *

2.

Cecil wondered if he should count the first night he spent at Carlos’s place as a relationship milestone. After all, it wasn’t their first time. Carlos had spent the night at Cecil’s twice already. Twice! But it felt significant being here for the first time. There was something intimate in ways beyond physical about welcoming someone into the most private places of your home, and sharing your most personal of spaces with your partner. From being in Carlos’s bedroom, Cecil could tell that he kept his personal space disorganized but clean, with scientific instruments and unsteady piles of charts and papers scattered over every flat surface, but no dust bunnies or used plates or glassware to be seen; that he liked a firm mattress; that he left his closet door open for convenience, and that the closet was more than half-full of lab coats. And now, in the morning, looking around Carlos’s bathroom as he got ready to leave, Cecil could tell that…oh.

Oh. Well, it was still early in their relationship, it wasn’t like they’d discussed… But surely Cecil would know - there were people who called the station to tell him that they’d seen Carlos buying eggplant at the Ralph’s, how could no one have told him…?

Cecil opened the bathroom door.

“Carlos?” Cecil called, trying to keep the tremor out of his voice, like it was no big deal, just curious, “Are you seeing someone else?”

“No, why?” Carlos said. He looked surprised.

“Then, whose toothbrush is this?” Cecil asked, holding up a cup in which there were two toothbrushes, one slightly used, and the second a different brand that looked new out of the package.

“Oh, um,” Carlos blushed a little, “That’s the kind you usually use, right? I thought it looked like the one you have in your apartment.”

“You bought me a toothbrush to keep at your place?”

“Well, it seemed reasonable, with a projected relationship trajectory from existing data points, that you might, you know, need one, um, scientifically speaking. A scientist is prepared. Do you want coffee?”

Carlos ducked into the kitchen very quickly.

“He bought me a toothbrush,” Cecil said to himself.

(Later, Cecil would ask his radio listeners if he was right in thinking that this meant something. “I mean, that’s a little forward, right?” Steve Carlsberg would call in to say that it probably didn’t mean anything at all. That jerk.)

* * *

3.

“It’s your watch,” Cecil said, letting himself sound surprised but keeping the disappointment out of his voice until he found out where Carlos was going with this. He’d been surprised and pleased that Carlos wanted to celebrate their one-month anniversary, an occasion he hadn’t expected the scientist to recognize, and touched and excited when, just moments ago, Carlos had taken a narrow wrapped box out of the pocket of his lab coat. Especially with the way Carlos had built it up: “I’m not as good at directly expressing my feelings as you are, Cecil. You work in communication and you’re very good with words. I work in science, where the words are less important than the results. The experiments can’t tell us directly if our hypotheses are correct, but their actions in response to our stimulus signify their underlying truth, a set of data that encodes meaning. As a scientist, it’s easier for me to show you how I feel.” And then he’d handed him the box. And it wasn’t that a watch was a _bad_ one-month anniversary gift, but an old, used watch that Carlos wore every day?

“Do you remember when I called you about the clocks?” Carlos asked.

“How could I forget?”

“I took apart every watch and clock and timepiece of any kind that I could get my hands on. This is the only one that works. I think it may be the only true timepiece in all of Night Vale.”

Carlos smiled like he had just explained everything. Apparently this meant something very significant to Carlos. Cecil still didn’t know what that was, but he felt better knowing that Carlos’s intention was to give him something special.

“That sounds important,” Cecil prompted. Carlos nodded.

“And you’re giving it to me, wow!” Carlos’s smile faltered.

“You need me to explain. Hmm. OK. In Night Vale, time isn’t real. It speeds up and slows down – in actuality, not just in our perception of it – it skips ahead, and when time travel is legal, it even moves backwards!”

“Right,” said Cecil, who knew all of this.

“Outside of Night Vale, that doesn’t happen. Time proceeds forward at 60 seconds to the minute, 9,192,631,770 transitions of the Cesium atom to second, always. There is no speeding up or slowing down, except theoretically at speeds approaching the speed of light. It never skips ahead, and it’s not possible to move back. Time is a constant. When I first came to Night Vale, I was scared of it, partly because it’s dangerous, but also because all the things that I’d thought were constants stopped being true. Even time. That was terrifying. But eventually I realized that this watch still keeps time as it’s supposed to be, each second the same length, moving forward at a steady rate. Earthquakes could go unfelt, dangerous levels of radiation could do no harm, wheat could break the laws of conservation of matter and energy by spontaneously transforming into snakes - but time as measured by this watch would always move forward at the same speed. When things got too hard, it was my constant.”

“But then, don’t you still need it?”

“No, I – I have another constant now.”

Cecil put the watch on. Then he leaned across the table and counted the ticks as he kissed Carlos for a long time.

(Later Cecil would realize that that was the first time he initiated a kiss instead of waiting for Carlos to make the first move.)


	2. Chapter 2

4.

“How can you tell if a relationship is falling into a rut?”

“Gosh, Cecil, I don’t know,” said Dana. It was one of the very few times since she’d gone into the Dog Park that she’d managed to call him when their phones were actually working in sync, but instead of giving him updates on her progress that he could relate on the air later, Dana had declared that she wanted to talk about “anything but where I am right now.” And when Cecil got to pick the topic of conversation, there was only ever one thing he wanted to talk about.

“Do you feel like your relationship with Carlos is falling into a rut?” she continued.

“No, I feel like it’s going great – but what if he’s getting bored with it?”

“Why would he be?”

“Well, we haven’t actually gone _out_ in a while. Lately, we just seem to be having dinner at one of our apartments and then watching TV on the couch. Which is wonderful, actually. I like that we have a routine, that we can be comfortable together without doing anything special, or that we can make these normal everyday moments special by sharing them together. But I don’t know if he feels the same.”

“Well, what did he say when you told him how you feel?”

“Nothing! Absolutely nothing.”

“Hm. That is weird, Cecil.”

Cecil sighed. “No, we had a big talk about this on our one-month anniversary. He explained. Scientists don’t communicate directly, with words. Instead, scientists try to show you how they feel and their partners have to interpret all the signs and signals they give off, like they themselves interpret data. I’d be so much better at this if I were another scientist.”

“Let’s try to interpret the data then,” said Dana, “What did Carlos _do_ when you told him that being together makes just hanging out on the couch feel special?”

“He kissed me on the cheek and pulled the blanket closer around us.”

“Well that sounds positive!”

“Yeah. Unless he was just trying to cover up an awkward moment.”

“I suppose that is a possibility…Why were you under a blanket though?”

“Oh, every time we watch TV together at his place he turns the thermostat down and throws a blanket over us on the couch. Wait, do you think that’s one of his arcane signs and signals?”

“I would say that changing the temperature control of his home and increasing his air conditioning bill so that he can cuddle up with you under a blanket is a fairly significant action.”

“He is pretty cuddly,” Cecil admitted.

“Then I think, based on the evidence, that your boyfriend also enjoys just hanging out together watching TV on the couch.”

“I would agree that the evidence does seem to suggest that,” Cecil said, “Oh, that is such a relief! I think maybe I’ll suggest that we actually go out somewhere for the next date anyway, though. Just so that things don’t become too routine.”

“That’s probably a good idea,” said Dana, “Look at us, relationship scientists!”

“I know, right? Oh, speaking of important relationships, have you gotten in touch with your family recently?”

“No, Cecil, I haven’t.” Dana sounded worried. “I tried to call my mother and my brother before I called you, but I couldn’t get through. For some reason I seem to have an easier time connecting with your phone.”

“Well then what are we doing talking about Carlos? Here, let me give you some family news...”

5.

“Cecil, I’m visiting you in the station during the weather for both personal and professional reasons.”

“Oh?” asked Cecil, whose heart always thrilled a little when Carlos surprised him.

“Yes. There is a meteor shower headed towards Night Vale. I don’t understand why, as it is not the right time of year for any of the normal meteor showers. But based on my calculations, I don’t think that these meteorites will burn up in the atmosphere like they normally do. These seem likely to come down intact, and present a real hazard to people and property. I need you to get the word out and warn people to take shelter while I look over the figures again.”

“That sounds very interesting!”

Carlos smiled. “It is interesting, but it’s also dangerous. Also, I made you an extra key for my apartment, and I’ve put the shirt you left there in the bottom drawer of my dresser, which I’ve cleaned out in case you want to add anything else to it.”

He dropped a key into Cecil’s outstretched hand.

“Carlos, this is unexpected!” said Cecil, smiling.

“Cecil it’s very important that people stay inside during this upcoming meteor shower. I don’t think they’ll get much larger than baseball-sized, but being hit by a baseball-sized lump of rock falling from the sky at high speed can be fatal. I’m leaving you this clipboard that has estimations of the area that will be affected and the duration of the shower. I need you to warn Night Vale for me.”

“Well, of course I will, but don’t you want to talk about-”

“There’s no time. I have to get back to studying these meteors, and you’re about to go back on the air.”

“You’re right, the weather’s almost over. But are you sure you don’t want to stay for an interview?”

“I can’t Cecil, but I’ll call you later. Goodbye.”

“Um, OK. Bye Carlos!”

He looked down at the key in his hand and kept smiling as the weather finished.

+1.

Carlos had cancelled every date they’d had that week: the three they had initially planned on, and the three attempts to reschedule those. The fourth time, he had gotten so wrapped up in his “fascinating” science that he had forgotten to call, again, even though he was generally getting better at that. Cecil was, quite understandably he thought, miffed.

Carlos promised, over and over again, to make it up to him, and finally he came up with this: Carlos, who set his own schedule at the lab, would take his day off that week at the same time as Cecil’s and they would spend the whole day together. The entire day. They would go out to breakfast together in the morning, then go to the zoo, go out again for dinner that evening, and then see how they felt – maybe they would take a walk or go bowling, or maybe they would just go back to Cecil’s apartment and watch a movie on his couch. And then Carlos would spend the night before going back to the lab the next day. He even promised to come over the night before so that they wouldn’t be late for breakfast, which meant, he pointed out, that if you counted the time they were sleeping, they would be spending 36 hours together – much longer than the time they had missed on those cancelled dates.

“Time isn’t real,” said Cecil, but he said it with a smile, so Carlos would know he was mollified. (Actually, he was quite pleased.)

And Carlos did come over the night before with a duffel containing everything he would need for the next two mornings. Late, because he had spent so long giving the other scientists instructions about how to wrap up the few experiments he had scheduled to finish the next day, but he had come as promised. It was a little too late for them to do anything except brush their teeth and go to sleep, but Cecil loved having Carlos lying beside him. (And Carlos hadn’t put it on the itinerary when they made their plans, but Cecil was privately hoping he could coax the scientist into a little slow, lazy morning-sex before breakfast.)

So that morning, when Carlos starting to shift in the bed beside him woke him up – Carlos always woke up first – instead of going back to sleep for another hour, Cecil rolled over and kissed his boyfriend. “Good morning,” he said sleepily.

Carlos smiled that sweet smile that still gave Cecil butterflies and said, “Good morning,” back. Then he put his hand on Cecil’s back and pulled him closer for another kiss, and Cecil could feel deep in his bones that this was going to be a perfect day.

Then Carlos’s phone started to ring, and Carlos was getting out of bed.

“Leave it,” said Cecil.

“It might be my parents,” Carlos said apologetically, fishing for his phone in his pile of yesterday’s discarded clothes. And Cecil couldn’t argue with that, because he knew that with the time differences between Night Vale and the outside world, communication often didn’t work at all, and when it did it came at unpredictable times, so Carlos had to pick up whenever his family called because they couldn’t be sure when they’d be able to call again. And if it was Carlos’s family, then Cecil really didn’t mind, but if it was the lab –

“It’s the lab,” said Carlos as he finally located his ringing phone in the pocket of his jeans. And before Cecil could tell him to ignore them, he had already swiped to answer and was holding the phone up to his ear. Cecil groaned.

“That shouldn’t be possible!” Carlos yelped excitedly. And then he was saying the words Cecil had been dreading: “I’ll be right there.”

Then Carlos, who was not the best multi-tasker at the best of times, was dashing around trying to pull on his clothes and get information from the other scientists and apologize to Cecil at the same time.

“I’m really, really sorry, Cecil, you know I would never leave right now if it wasn’t a serious emergency – What color are the flames? – I know I’ve said it before, but I swear I will make it up to you this time – No, don’t vent the smoke until we know the chemical composition of the gases, keep everything sealed – I promise I’ll come right back as soon as we’ve dealt with this, it shouldn’t take more than an hour or two- It did what when the sprinklers hit it?!”

Cecil rolled his eyes. He should have known this would happen. Just because his lab was apparently “on fire” or whatever, Carlos was cancelling _another_ date. Typical. (OK…to be fair, if the radio station was on fire, Cecil would probably be running out the door, too – but it was always something with him!)

Then Carlos was standing over him.

“OK, Cecil, I’ll call you as soon as I can,” he leaned over and pecked him on the lips, “I’ve gotta go, I love you, bye!”

And before Cecil could react in any way at all, Carlos was already running out the door shouting more questions to the other scientists into the phone. Cecil had barely gotten his mouth open when he heard his front door slam behind Carlos.

_Did he just say…? I mean, that happened, right? I didn’t just imagine…_

Then Cecil was grabbing his phone off his nightstand, searching through his contacts, and finding that secret number he only labelled as “Source #5.”

“Hi! I’m not calling about a story this time,” Cecil said, “Listen, I know this is a little unorthodox, but I was wondering if there was any way I could get some information from the surveillance on my own apartment…Yeah, I know it’s more common to spy on _other_ people, but I could bribe you anyway…No, I don’t mind trading in my Stop-Sign immunity at all…That would be great.” Cecil waited while he was transferred.

“Hi, this is going to seem like a weird question, but you’ve been doing the surveillance on my apartment for the past few minutes, right? I was wondering if you heard-”

“Yes, Cecil, Carlos said, ‘I love you,’” interrupted the Sheriff’s Secret Policewoman, “I’m typing up the transcript now. He said, ‘OK, Cecil, I’ll call you as soon as I can, I’ve gotta go, I love you, Bye.’”

“Oh my God!” Cecil squealed.

“I know,” she said, and he could hear a bit of a smile in her voice.

“But do you think he said it on purpose? I mean, it sounded like he didn’t even notice he was saying it.”

“Yeah, I thought so too,” she agreed, “But maybe that’s a good thing, you know? That it just slipped out by accident. Like, maybe it’s always there as an undercurrent even if he’s never said it before.”

“But what if he didn’t really mean it? He said it like it was just a force of habit, and it shouldn’t be, because he’s never said it before. What if he only said it now because he used to say it to someone else when he rushed out of bed in the morning?”

“You could find out.”

“How?”

“Next time you go out together, tell him that you love him and see if he says it back.”

“I don’t know. I’m sure he knows that I love him. I’m pretty _obvious_ about it.”

“You can say that again.”

“And I don’t want to put any pressure on him. I think I’ll just wait until he says it again. On purpose.”

“Well, if that’s what you want to do.”

“I think so.”

“Hey, Cecil? For what it’s worth, I think he did mean it.”

“Yeah, I think so too.” And Cecil fell back on the pillow, smiling so widely he thought his face would crack.

Carlos did call later. Not in an hour, not in two, but eventually. It was too late for breakfast, or brunch, or the zoo, but there was enough time to go out for a late lunch/early dinner and take a nice long walk in Mission Grove park before the sun set, so they did that instead; before going back to Cecil’s place, just like they had planned. And it ended up being a very nice day. Carlos never did figure out why Cecil forgave him so easily for running out that morning or why he was so happy to see him that he didn’t get upset when Carlos showed up with his “perfect” hair singed. But Carlos was happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Cecil's little speech in Condos always made me wonder about what sort of "arcane signs and signals" Carlos had tried to use to communicate with before. I'm supposed to be working on something else right now, but I've been writing this every time I get stuck somewhere and it looks like I have enough for a chapter now.
> 
> Let me know what you think!


End file.
